Maybe not.
This is tape number four. I'm interviewing Clary Rosenblom.
You told me that the factory was bombed and you were living in a cellar where water was dripping.
Yes, exactly, where water was dripping.
And we were together with my best friend, her name is Margit Werder.
And I was so sad when the food became worse and you became more and more hungry.
And you know, when you are hungry, I don't think there is a worse thing.
Thirsty, water, and then you are hungry, that you faint because you are hungry.
And you can't do anything.
So I prayed, you know, it's also a strange thing, but it was true.
And I prayed at night, "Oh, dear God", the second time God heard me.
"Can't you make me sick, so that I can gather my bread?"
"So that I can be fed once?"
"Whether you believe it or not, I became sick and vomited."
"And I gave up my sops until I had a relative from another city."
"I gave up my rations for her, who was my best friend, and for another one."
"When I became healthy, I had four days of that, and I had under my pillow."
"Pillow and pillow."
"There was no pillow, I don't know what it was."
"And when I became healthy, the next day I had no bread left."
"They had stolen all my bread."
"They stole from each other."
"Mothers and children could harm each other."
"And that hurt me very much."
"Very, very much."
"And then I was happy again that I didn't have my mother and my sister."
"That I didn't have to see my mother suffer."
"And all the time I thought like that."
"And then people started to gather, you know, when my besties died."
"Then I have seen, there in Essen, it was raining."
"They had pneumonia."
"The more powerful and stronger they were when we came to Auschwitz."
"I was thin."
"And the others who were strong and looked so strong, they died first."
"They couldn't make it."
"I don't know how."
"Or why."
"Maybe they didn't eat so well at home as children, right?"
"Even though they were strong, they ate a lot of bread or..."
"Or not so well, right?"
"But they couldn't make it and many died."
"That's when it started."
"Then suddenly, you know, it could have been..."
"The end of February, the beginning of March."
"Then they again said that we were going away."
"And then we also went by train."
"But where? We didn't know."
"Then they started bombing several stations."
"But we never went to the bunker."
"The Germans have gone to the bunker, but not us."
"So it took many, many days."
"And then we arrived in Bergen-Belsen."
"What kind of wagons?"
"Red wagons."
"Then it was only seats, not wagons."
"It was ordinary, old benches."
"Did you get any food during the trip?"
"Yes, but nothing special."
"When we left, several stations stopped and they bombed."
"But maybe not all of our wagons arrived, but we did."
"When I arrived in Bergen-Belsen, they said that there was a family hospital nearby."
"And I thought, 'Oh my God, a family hospital!'"
"So I called my mother again."
"And you know, all the time I had the big chimney in Auschwitz in front of me."
"And I knew in my mind where the chimney was."
"And I followed where I was shared by my mother, which way I went and which way they went."
"And when they went, there was no barracks."
"I knew that, and I knew it too, but I didn't want to know that it was a crematorium."
"I said to myself that God can't be so cruel."
"That it happened."
"I couldn't understand."
"And everywhere I have looked for my mother in Bergen-Belsen."
"And in that family hospital I have found my uncle, my mother's brother."
"And it was closed."
"So they said, 'You have an uncle named so-and-so.'"
"They asked the city, 'Where are you from? Is there anyone from the same city?'"
"And then he came to the closure."
"It was his wife and his five-year-old child that I told about in Auschwitz."
"And I didn't tell him."
"That they went with their mother."
"But he knew it."
"It came to light."
"And he got a package from the Red Cross."
"Cigarettes and a few different things."
"They had better things there with the Red Cross than we had."
"So he gave me some raw potatoes."
"And he ate shells instead."
"And a few cigarettes that I couldn't give to the Germans."
"Blocker testers."
"And I got soup."
"One more soup."
"Do you understand when I had cigarettes?"
"And that uncle saved me."
"I guess so."
"And he also survived the war."
"So they moved from there."
"He left the Red Cross."
"They emptied out."
"And the last days, you see, all the Germans had already fled."
"When they knew that we had been liberated."
"They whispered that we were going to be liberated soon."
"You know, they whispered all the time."
"But during the war, those who could walk, they saw so many dead."
"Mass graves."
"So everyone who could walk had to die in the barracks."
"And my best friend, in the last days, we didn't have a bed in Bergen-Belsen."
"So we lay on the stone floor."
"And she died next to me."
"They didn't want to be afraid."
"And the same with that aunt, this Blanca."
"The daughter survived."
"And they also found the father."
"The whole family had found each other and she died."
"Because most of them died after liberation."
"But because of this mass grave work."
"I don't understand how you could do that, you see."
"To pull the dead by the hands."
"They had bones and skin."
"And we pulled several hundred meters."
"Before we got there, there were the mass graves."
"And we threw them there."
"Who did that?"
"I did."
"And then suddenly we were liberated, I remember that."
"When we were liberated, they threw away the cans."
"Gold colored cans."
"And there was chocolate and other things inside."
"And then everyone who started eating that."
"Even more dead."
"And then we got tiffus immediately."
"And then I couldn't walk anymore."
"But I still tried to find something."
"As long as I could walk, I don't remember."
"I only remember when they packed us in trucks."
"And drove us to the hospital."
"And I don't remember at all."
"I just remember that they cut my hair one more time."
"Because it was light."
"Dirty."
"Were you still alive when you were liberated?"
"Yes, but I couldn't walk."
"I couldn't enjoy it."
"Because I thought we weren't normal."
"And many who have passed today are still looking for rotten things."
"You know, when the Germans disappeared from the camp."
"All the SS men were blown away one morning."
"And then you could walk as you wanted, no one guarded us."
"No meat and no one has told you not to go."
"We weren't guarded anymore."
"And those who dared to go and look for food, they did."
"But that was the biggest mistake."
"Because then everyone died."
"And I survived."
"And ended up in the hospital with typhus."
"And I couldn't eat normal food, nothing."
"But I didn't understand why."
"So there they started talking about us going to Sweden, to paradise."
"And there we were waiting."
"They described ten long dresses."
"What we were going to get."
"And you know, going to Sweden, you knew when you went to Siberia."
"You were prepared, it's very cold here."
"But it's so fantastic here."
"Who told you that?"
"One after the other, I don't know when they picked us up."
"They heard so little, so they told us a lot."
"We just knew that we wanted to go to Sweden."
"And I just remember that I didn't have any siblings."
"There were a few of us who survived from our town."
"And we agreed that we would go to Sweden."
"The ones who were in the hospital."
"But I lost the rest."
"Then we met."
"So we went from Lybäk to the fishing boats."
"And I remember that I was very sick."
"I couldn't walk, I threw up all the time."
"I couldn't eat."
"Then we got to the fishing boats, and I remember that we got fishballs."
"I remember that so well."
"Fishballs with tomato sauce or something like that."
"And Mariachäst."
"And I will never forget that Mariachäst."
"How wonderful it was."
"Mariachäst, you know."
"And then we got fishballs, and we got to Malmö or Lybäk."
"Malmö, Lund."
"And when we got off the boat, they gave us Swedish bread and sausage."
"And they disinfected us."
"They undressed us, and we got a change of clothes."
"They undressed us, I don't remember what it was, but we were clean at least."
"And the smorgasbords were open, and we got bread, and sweet bread, and sweet limes."
"And nobody wanted to eat sweet bread."
"And there was sausage and everything else on it."
"So it was fantastic."
"Then we were placed in Lund, in a school."
"In quarantine for three weeks."
"And then it was wonderful, you know."
"And then we got the toilet paper."
"But it was fantastic food, you could see everything every day, it was delicious."
"You know, after this one I undressed."
"And I didn't get stronger, you know."
"And when we ate lunch or dinner,"
"I went behind the school and undressed after every meal."
"Instead of telling them that I wasn't feeling well and asking for a doctor,"
"I didn't do that."
"Because I didn't get used to eating."
"And since then I've eaten bread and sausage."
"And then in '56 I got a concentration camp, among other things."
"But when we heard that we were also there, we were in quarantine for three weeks."
"And then we went to Låkabron."
"Another camp in the summer, a few months."
"From there I changed."
"There we got five kronor, I think, for ten days."
"We got it."
"So I remember so well when we started to save money together,"
"and bought yarn and knitted, that we should have something on us."
"At that time it wasn't like that, you know, we saved this five kronor,"
"so we could buy, you know, something, that we should have clothes on us."
"Because we only got one change of clothes, and that was all."
"And then we were there, and then those who recovered somehow,"
"so we went to work."
"So I went to Möllike."
"And thirty girls we lost."
"Again we were together, a few from our town."
"And thirty young girls, you know."
"Both of them got a house in Möllike."
"And there we lived with thirty girls."
"And the older ones who wanted to be there, they got a little salary,"
"from our salary."
"And they cooked food."
"So we had lived as a collective in that house."
"And in 1945 we came here, in the autumn of 1945."
"And there we lived, and we took the bus to Möndal."
"Beveri."
"And we worked there in shifts."
"Once a night, once a day."
"And we were very happy, you know, we were so relieved,"
"because we had our normal clothes on,"
"and we had eaten, and then I started to feel better too."
"And seven years passed, and we thought we were normal."
"And we were grateful."
"So suddenly, you know, I came to think,"
"that I had received a letter from my uncle,"
"who had given me cigarettes."
"He had gone home to Lund."
"And he wrote to me,"
"and I asked him, 'Have you heard anything from my dad?'"
"Because I thought that I would be the first to get my dad back,"
"so I thought it was me."
"Because he stayed in Lund and didn't come to Auschwitz."
"And he never answered me, you know, he never did."
"And then one day I wrote to him,"
"I want to know, I've been through so much,"
"I want to know what happened to dad."
"You don't answer me, and you probably know,"
"that I've never received a letter from dad,"
"that if he were to live, he would have looked for me."
"And then I wrote, 'No,' and then it was finished,"
"and then I prayed to God again."
"Please God, can't I dream what happened to dad?"
"And it was so, you know, that I dreamed,"
"it's also in front of me,"
"I dreamed that they had gone,"
"and dad climbed up a mountain,"
"and got shot and rolled down."
"That's the dream I have, I remember it to this day."
"After that I got a letter from my uncle,"
"and wrote that dad lived in 1945,"
"in March, in Danzig, Germany,"
"and there were four friends in Danzig on the morning of March 45."
"They were there, and there was a road,"
"that went to the right and left,"
"and they discussed which way they should choose,"
"and what my dad had done with his hand,"
"but it doesn't matter to me which way I choose,"
"I don't have a family anyway."
"And the other two came home,"
"and dad and the others were shot,"
"and I dreamed,"
"because I prayed so hard that I would do it,"
"because I wanted to go home to Lungen,"
"and not stay in Sweden."
"Then my uncle wrote that I should come home,"
"because he had no children."
"And then I met my husband,"
"in the beginning of January or February 1996."
"At that time they started sending packages,"
"so I earned a few kronor,"
"so I sent a package to my uncle,"
"a package of one kilo,"
"and that's how I met them."
"My best friends in Argentina,"
"Klari, we met two brothers,"
"because my husband had a brother,"
"and he was a little older,"
"but they were two very good, fantastic brothers."
"And one of them is good for you,"
"said one of my friends,"
"let me be with Polish guys,"
"I don't want Polish guys," I said.
"So I met him at the post office,"
"in this society in Munich,"
"and he turned me upside down,"
"he was ten years older than me,"
"and he always laughed, he was very happy."
"So he turned me upside down,"
"and said, 'You're good for me,'"
"and I laughed, you know, compared to a child."
"I still had soles on my feet,"
"when I came to Sweden."
"I still had soles on my feet,"
"not regular socks."
"So we lived in this villa,"
"and he started to watch me,"
"and as I didn't know,"
"you know, I was alone."
"So we got along with each other,"
"and we went out together,"
"but we didn't promise to do anything,"
"but I wanted to go home to London."
"So my uncle heard from someone else,"
"who had gone home to London,"
"that I was with a Polish guy."
"So he said, 'You're going home with him,'"
"and he was afraid that I would get hurt,"
"that I was so young,"
"that I wouldn't go in the company for so long."
"So I stayed."
"I had packed up and said goodbye to my job,"
"in Sweden,"
"and I wanted to leave Sweden in 1946."
"I had tickets,"
"and everything,"
"and sent away packages,"
"and at that time you had packed packages,"
"so you put one rubber boot in one package,"
"and in the other package you put the other rubber boot,"
"so that they wouldn't get stolen,"
"because one didn't want anything."
"So you know, that was the end of the war."
"So I wasn't afraid of Sweden,"
"but I was afraid that when I got to London,"
"all the packages were sent away,"
"and I was going to leave."
"And then I fell in love with him,"
"and he didn't know we owned nothing,"
"and had nothing,"
"because what were we going to build our lives with?"
"He worked in the factory,"
"and I worked in the factory in shifts,"
"and we had nothing."
"But then I stopped,"
"and then my happiness began,"
"and I'm grateful,"
"that it has become like this,"
"and that's how I got married."
How old were you when you got married?
We got engaged in December '46,
and in the beginning of '47 we got married.
In the beginning of '47 we got married.
And then we got a small apartment,
one room, which was about the size of the yard.
We didn't get it.
We paid 500 kronor,
because we got it from some other refugee.
And you know, you couldn't break in the window.
When we opened the window,
there was maybe 12 square meters of space in the whole apartment.
And with a roof over our heads.
And one time we got married in the night,
in the winter, when it was cold.
That's how it started, and I wanted us to get married,
so we started saving.
And we saved every krona.
The money I had earned,
maybe 20 kronor a week,
I kept it for food.
And when I had food, I bought things like this,
I could buy a sheet,
or a handkerchief for payment,
or something that was worth it.
And I saved, because he didn't want children,
because we didn't own anything.
And I just yearned for it.
I always stood by the stroller,
wondering when I would have a child.
So I've been married for a few years,
since I was born in 1950.
I gave birth to my first wonderful daughter.
And I wanted a daughter.
And I've told you,
that I have a teacher in the camp,
and her name is Anita.
And I've said that I thought she was so kind,
that when I had a daughter,
her name would be Anita.
And her name is Anita.
She was born in 1950.
And I am very...
We have saved and worked very hard.
To pay for things.
I remember that you said that my hobby was music.
The first piece of furniture that we bought for payment,
was a radio and a gramophone.
That was my first piece of furniture.
Where did you live then?
We lived in the little apartment,
and I worked in the factory all the time.
We didn't know how to work.
I said that I would go to school,
because I was so young before I left the farm.
But I said no, I don't want to go to school,
because I'm going home to my dad.
I'm going home to my dad.
But I stayed here.
And I'm very grateful for Sweden.
I've worked very hard,
and I've had very difficult times.
I spent a lot of time in the hospital,
because I had a migraine.
I always had a very big migraine,
and no doctor could cure it.
I thought that I got so many blows to the head.
I spent a lot of time in the hospital.
I worked and spent time in the hospital.
They were researching all the time.
They didn't know where I got the migraine.
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